The Birth of a Myth - III

Sounds rushed into him from all sides. His ears repeatedly penetrated by the ringing, the clanking, the clinking, and of course, the tinkling... tinktinktink tink tinktinktinktink.

Lights blinding him constantly. The waiting room was bathed in mellow-blue soothing light but from everywhere came flashing red lights and flashing yellow lights... those lights reminded him of his rave parties already seven years ago.

A five year old stood near one of the light-and-sound-emitting contraptions and, completely entranced and thoughtless, stared timelessly at it... the mother sat behind one of the boxes, pressing buttons like an experienced drug-addicted professional pianist, the father was nowhere.

Slouched on the chair sat Dr. R.
Dr. R. has just recently become a Dr. Only three weeks ago he was simply R. His mother loved to call him Dr. R., his father too, yet they were far away... he saw them very infrequently.
Slouched on the chair sat the good Dr., the main character of this short narration, and beside him, piled on another seat, was:
- his "pneumatic" bag containing the laptop (which he lovingly called "la virgen"), a nail cutter, some cientific articles, some pens and an unopened book offered to him by a friend (yes we will get back to the book);
- a digital camera (usual, nothing special, 4.5 Mpix... some asian brand);
- a meter long tube containing his cientific poster which he had so successfully presented only yesterday.
A small backpack with random pieces of clothing rested between his feet which, in turn, rested shoeless and sockless on the carpet... brown carpet I believe (hard to tell due to the blue light).


What a conference it had been! Fresh out of graduate school and already the great names in biology were raving about him... how the method he developed had opened a world of possibilities for studying the environment!

He slouched down low on the seat and allowed his eyes and ears to be permeated by the surroundings.


- Hello, can I have your attention please. Due to unexpected circumstances, flight number 331 to Punjab, with stopover in Myanmar, has vacated three seats. We are offering these seats for the reduced price of three hundred US dolares each. We also remind that boarding for flight 331 has started and will close in fifteen minutes.
Thank you

The mother stood up. Frantically looked around for the child. Located him. Agressively grabbed his arm and walked bruskly towards the restrooms.
The child did not resist.
Five years had taught him that sometimes his mother would unexpectedly grab and drag him and that it did absolutely no diference wether he wanted to be taken or not. The first few times he resisted (most of all mentally since there is not much resistance which a three year old can do) but was taken all the same.
The key revelation came at four years of age when he tried not resisting. In fact, not only did he not resist but he was so open to her violently dragging him that he actually savored the act. Classifying it as pleasant was not in his mind, no, in fact, the nails biting into his soft skin and his shoulder nearly popping out of the socket were rather unpleasant... but oh what a rush it was!

Dr. R. watched and saw the child.
Dr. R. saw the child.
Automatically, calmly, he slipped on his shoes, picked up his belongings, and, without a thought in his mind, walked towards the counter of flight number 331 while his hand caressed the new Billabong wallet in his right pocket.

On Freedom and Other Things II

Dr Plim and Roballs walked through the dark hallway at the end of which an open and well lit gate awaited them.

-Plim, a few days ago I went to the cinema with Nicole...

-Nice! Way to go! You finally asked her out.

-Yeah... it was great, she is a really (!) great person...

-Go on, what is wrong?

-Well, it was the first date... and we just talked a lot... hugged... and I managed to caress her hair...

-So?

-Well, I was really turned on the whole time (Plim snikkers) and the movie we watched didn`t really help...

-What movie?

-It was "Sex and Lucia".

-Oh...

-So, man, when I got home, after she dropped me off, I couldn`t like go to bed... so I made some smaller limb marmelade*.

-(silence)

There walk had made them come to the gate, they opened it slightly further and continued on.
Descending some steps led them from the blue carpeted floor to the cold cement.
Roballs was going to continue talking but a beautiful full-breasted blond sorority girl asked him for something... he removed the something from his jeans and showed it to her... knowing Plim she did not ask to see his... they walked on.

-Man, I am catholic and the church says that it is wrong it is wrong it is wrong... wrong to stimulate, provoke, pleasures of the body. So now I feel really bad with myself.
What does the church have against the body anyway??
And it is not only the christians but seems like most religions say the body is bad!!

-Man... the whole problem stems back to the time of Adam and Eve you see. Supposedly, Adam and Eve were expelled from the Garden not because they ate from the tree of knowledge but because they preferred themselves over God! Their sin was not that they did not love God but that they loved themselves more and wanted to become gods... thus they ate the fruit. What christianity really condemns is the excessive love for the body since that way one will forget both God and other men.
Unfortunately the reason I just mentioned has been, in most instances, lost... this has led to practices such as denial of sense pleasures and of sexuality, fasting, and mortification of the flesh (inflicting pain on the body in an attempt to weaken or punish it because it is regarded as sinful).
You see what I mean Roballs?

-I see... not even animals treat themselves as bad...

-Actually, Roballs, especially animals don`t treat themselves this way.

-I don`t understand.

-Well, both animals and humans, let`s, momentarily, for the sake of simplicity, make the distinction, share the basic bodily functions. Here I am talking about pleasure, pain, eating, sleeping, sexual drive, birth and death. But, it seems that once humans attained a higher level of consciousness they became afraid that those bodily functions would cause them to fall into an animalistic behaviour.
You understand don`t you?!

-They did not want to think they were animals.

-Exactly Roballs, and so they created the distinction between themselves and their body when, in fact, no distinction need exist.
They saw themselves as having a body, rather than just being it.
Religions then enhanced this disassociation, spreading the "you are not your body" belief.
Enlightenment, even as Buddha achieved it, is through the body and not away from it.

-Wow... that is crazy how something can be so misunderstood!

-Right, but Roballs, one last thing which should also be clear is how our perception of our body has, unfortunately, become very weakened... Martial arts, yogic practices, and even simply meditation, all have in their roots the intention of providing the practitioner a method for him to better know their body. Most people never come in contact with such teachings and for them the body is a crude physical entity which suffers illnesses, aging, and finally death. Most people never really know themselves... their bodies.

-Great! So I can make the straws** without feeling bad about it!! Thanks Dr Plim, now I know what is enlightenment!

Bruskly forcing the swimming cap over his head and placing the goggles on, Roballs, ignoring the lifeguard, dived headfirst into the pool and began the first of 50 laps.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
* from the spanish "mermelada de miembrillo" meaning to masturbate.
** from the spanish "hacer las pajas" meaning... to masturbate.

Postscript:
"He who seeks liberation does not see his body as an obstacle, but rather as an instrument. Ascetic practices, even the most severe, are a progressive mastering of the body. The yogi tries to convert the body into the weapon of liberation." -Octavio Paz in "In light of India".

On Freedom and Other Things I

The bird tries to rise up into the air (why it does so... who knows? who cares? something to do with what some people call "its nature") and the thin fishing line tied to its foot stretches and pulls it back down...
It falls and tries to catch its breath... or perhaps just trying to gain courage to try again.
Question: Why does it try to fly? Can`t it be happy living in the semisphere of 2 meters in diameter which the string allows it to know? It has food and water...

The simple fact that it, the bird, cannot fly further than two meters (even if it knows not what lies past those 2 meters, be it better or worse) makes it want to go further... The bird identifies what is binding him and wants to break that source... simply because it exists... not because it is stopping the bird from doing something in specific. It is not because there is a female bird, at 2.1 meters, calling him and flirting with him that this bird wants to fly further.

If asked: "What is freedom?" the bird will reply: "Removal of that string which is binding me."


Question: What is freedom for us? What are the strings which are binding us?

My string is the fact that I have a scientific proposal to write by Friday; once that is done I will be free.
My string is that I have an olympic swimming competition in two months; once that is done I will be free.
My string is that I have to wear this suit all day long at work; once I get out of the suit I will be free.
My string is my girlfriend who is keeping me from going climbing; once I am at the rock-face I will be free.
In all the above cases one can simply add: ... free and happy.

So what is the problem? Why is it that after Friday, after the two months, after the suit has been removed, and once you are at the rock-face you still do not feel fully "free and happy"?
I thought I had removed that string!!!!

You simply misidentified the string.
The real string is the above cases is your own desires and your own fears.
-Two strings?
-No, one and the same. For every desire there is an associated fear. For every fear there is the associated desire. Cut the string and both will leave.

-So.... you mean.... I should live without desires?! I can understand living without fears but without desires... My desires determine my goals... am I (and everyone else) supposed to live without goals??? An aimless life? A life without action?!
-Action is the key word there. One must continue to act. The Universe does not stop acting, there are always things happening in the world, Creation is always taking place; a decision to not act, to be passive, is going against your nature and the nature of everything. Action occurs.
-And my goals?
-Your goals must exist for Action to have an intention, a purpose. The fine line which one must walk is having goals without attachment... a very fine line.
One will want to climb Everest, one will set out to do so, but if you perform it without attachment then you will be capable of savoring every step of the way... if, however, you are obsessed with summiting Everest then you will lose your conscious perception of the present moment and be living in function of your desires.

Your goals should be a part of your life. Your life should not be a part of your goals.
Once your happiness seems to have become dependent on the achieval or fulfillment of a goal then you have crossed the line.
Once you feel fully satisfied simply savoring every moment in your day, especially those in which you have to wait for something and nothing seems to be happening, then you will know that your goals are not ruling your perception of the world.
Do not strive to feeling fully satisfied at every moment, that will come naturally, just as the pleasures of flight and the discovery of the unknown world will come naturally with the cutting of the string.

-Thank you Dr Plim I am now enlightened.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Regarding Fasting

Today is another fasting day.

Following Ananda Marga, my fasts consist on no liquids or solids from dinner to the second breakfast, over 24 hours.

Many people comment on how ridiculous such a fast is and how all it can be is harmful. Recently I realized a simple way of describing my view on this subject:
- fasting is not the goal, it is a method.

The objective of a fast is purification of the body and strengthening of the mind (building will power).
If someone decides to do a fast without first researching the method then it will most likely hurt the body and not purify it.
If you decide to fast but spend the whole day craving food and anxiously awaiting the moment when you can eat again then you will not be strengthening anything.

The Birth of a Myth - II

"I would like to have an ibook! or perhaps the powerbook!!
that`s crazy... way too expensive...
but
I can just see myself traveling by plane with it in a nice, discreet case...
or
walking into javalounge, the smell of burnt coffee in the air, saying "hi" to a couple of people (with just a wave of the hand and a big smile) and then sitting down, on one of those large bean bags, and placing the oh-so-stylish ibook on my lap.
now That would be great!

I can just imagine the rush of adrenaline it would be to receive the package... or even receive a phonecall from the secretary saying: "there is a package here, from Macintosh I believe"

wow

perhaps I should get it..."

George sat and gazed at his Stellar Dynamics review sheet in the same way as a coma patient gazes towards the clouds. It was only when a small drop of warm saliva rolled from the corner of his mouth and fell on the back of his right hand that his attention returned to the present moment.

Across the cafeteria sat Paiola. She sat cross-legged on a chair, the edges of her skirt pulled up around her knees so you could not see her legs at all, only the white skirt with green leaves floating two-dimensionally. Her elbow rested on the grey metal of the desk and her right hand supported the burden of her forehead.
Her mother would have asked her if her head was too heavy for her neck but it had been a long time since she had been with her mother and her thoughts were elsewhere.

"Why can`t life be simpler?
...
can it be that I love them both?
can that happen? what if I decide to date one of them and I realize I didn`t love him and then the other one has already found someone else... or is no longer interested in me?! what do I do then?
but I have to decide... but on what criteria??
Arggghhhh!!!!
and just recently I didn`t love anyone!
Why is life so complicated???"

The Birth of a Myth

mahalo for the incentive

His gaze set on the horizon.

The sun had now been slowly approaching that which so many of the great thinkers had once called "the edge of the world", the horizon, for several minutes now...
approaching it at an acute angle like a stone hurled towards the serene waters of a fictitious lake by the hand of a fictitious child...
for a moment he, just as that child, wondered wether the Sun would, just this once, skip off the horizon, rising magically back up into the sky, or if it would plunge into the earthen waters, extinguishing itself and leaving everyone in darkness.

His eyes now resembled those of a madman.
A pair of round pupils seeing but without looking.
Eyes that give away nothing of what the bearer is thinking.
He was simply observing and nobody knew (not that it mattered), not even he, that few people, or animals for that matter, had lived sunsets and sunrises as intensely as he did now.
The perfect observer.

- p...

He thought he heard someone whisper his name yet he needn`t turn around to know the voice had come from inside and that here, now, in the limbo between day and night, no-one would be calling for him.

days of fasting caused the senses to conjure the sweetest of aromas and the most exotic of tastes, days of silence induce the winds into speaking in the most melodic of voices

Summary of Friday March 04th Conversation

Priorities

It seems that an a younger age one tends to have several interests amongst which they distribute their time and efforts and as the years go by one finds him or herself focusing all the time and effort into one interest.
Generally it is ones` job which ends up being the dominating interest.
It seems, however, that this tendency for, let`s call it specialization, goes against the personal will since most people regret having lost the other components of their lives.
Many times the dominating interest never was an interest in the first place but simply a means of generating income, in those cases one must feel profoundly unsatisfied.

How does one allow this to occur and, perhaps more importantly, if one does in fact still feel the urge to pursue his other facets then what steps should one take to bring them back to "primeiro plano", back to the foreground?

Some may invoke "responsibility" as being the reason for the gradual specialization to have occurred but responsibility works not only for your job and for others but also for oneself!
A good mental exercise is to suppose there are three people who need your time on a certain day. You should, in fact, imagine that there are four people, the extra one being yourself, you should feel the sense of responsibility for all four, and you should partition your time for all four.
Do not neglect yourself, at any time, seems to be the key to not losing those different facets which make your person complete and happy.

This leads on to the concept of happiness which has been eternally debated:

What is happiness?

The world has happy occasions and sad occasions... or better, pleasant situations and unpleasant situations. The human being, as a well tuned antenna, simply perceives those situations and feels them. One cannot only feel the pleasant situations because if one is capable of feeling then he will also feel the unpleasant ones. It is what one does with the feeling that differentiates the outlook which one has on life.
One can become depressed, unhappy, thoughfull, and so on, by an unpleasant situation.
One can become overjoyed, ecstatic, happy, delighted, and so on, by a pleasant situation.
The situations in life are stimuli to which the being reacts. An optimistic/positive person will feel just as much as a pessimistic person but will decide to treat the situation as a learning experience and not allow it to take a hold of him.

Attachment
You step to the ridge of a valley and are awestruck by the beauty of a waterfall on the other side. It makes you smile at how grand it is, after a while you leave.
One should be aware that the feelings which surged upon looking at the waterfall belong to the observer, exclusively. If the rocks which make up the waterfall collapse, thus destroying it, the observer will be untouched and the feeling which the waterfall caused the observer to live (and which truly make up the waterfall) will too be untouched. In this way one should learn to not have any attachment in life.

The one thing which makes you feel that life is great and beautiful and worth living is also the one thing that can take you to the depths of unhapiness, to extreme sadness, the one thing that can detroy you. This for the same reason, attachment; one tends to hold on to that which gives the most pleasure. Dependance arises.
You hold on to the Ferrari as being the reason for your good feelings, and thus, whatever happens to the Ferrari happens to you too, to your emotions.

You hold on to that job you have wanted so much and whatever happens to that job, whatever ups and downs it has, you also feel; it determines your mood.

True happiness is independant of that which happens around you. It is independant of how beautiful your wife is, how big your house is, or which brand of car you own.

True or absolute happiness is inside of you, a quality which everyone has but which most people simply haven`t found, whereas most people nowadays only know relative happiness.

Many top athletes want to go to the olympic games and win a gold medal. Regardless of wether or not they are doing their best, or wether or not they are having fun, they want to win the gold medal. They will push the limits of their bodies, renounce to other pleasures such as being with friends, focus on the defects of the opponents, and so on, so that they can win the gold medal. While they are striving for that medal they are living a period of stress, mental and physical, it is the relief of this extreme stress, when they (hopefully) win the gold that they associate with happiness. But this is relative happiness because they are now free of all that stress, they are at zero stress so they are better than before...
However, soon they will raise their standards and focus on another goal and, once again, give everything to attain that goal... once again living in stress... it is similar to the story of the man who had everything the world could offer him, everything anyone could ever want, and thus he would resort to wearing shoes which were a size too small such that, every night, he would feel extreme happiness as he removed them.

Absolute happiness, inner bliss, is not dependant on achievements, outcomes, medals... it is not dependant on what others believe is correct, on everyone elses` views of your actions, on recognition.

Most importantly: step into action.

Words, conversation, can be extremely strong in that, when said by someone who can really transmit well and when received by someone who can receive well, the receiver immediately understands and is altered by those words thus the period of action which is normally necessary for one to put into practice what was preached and to practically understand the lesson, is unecessary.
However, words can be also the weakest form of communication and not affect you in the slightest... this happens when either the receiver or the sender (or both) are weak.

Stepping towards action.
Once words have outlined the path and sown seeds of inspiration, then it is time for action.
Action without first having prepared the ground is pointless action, action without fundament, and leads nowhere.
The land will not provide fruit if one prepares it meticulously but then does not take the step to sow the seeds and care for them.
Action and creating inspiration are both pointless if they are not tied together.

The question then is how to take action? - In baby steps.
One needs to place deadlines for himself not only in work (generally imposed by others and to which one has to adjust) but in all other aspects such as social and spiritual growth. If one wants to someday be in the position where he will be capable of achieving inner peace then he needs to take many small steps in spiritual and personal learning over the course of, probably, many years (just as one does not go from building instruments for a Meade 12" telescope to building instruments for a 30m telescope in a matter of days).

Which steps to take?
The presence of a guru, a guide, is always necessary in this matter. Everyone has the potential for achieving spiritual enlightenment yet, one needs a teacher/guide to help in fullfilling that potential.
A Guru is someone in whom you place your trust and who leads you in your path, telling you which is the next step you should take and when you should take it. Necessary it is to place trust since there are a multitude of steps which one must take and lead to the exploration of a darkness which evokes fear.
Trust is imperative.
The Guru, which may simply be a friend of yours, can see defects which you may have and are not aware of; or he can be someone who opens your eyes to other paths in life which, alone, you would never have been aware of.

Unwavering determination
By defining and following through with attainable objectives one slowly performs action and moves in the direction of personal growth.

P.P.Man!

Polla Plot!
Pa pa pa pa pa Polla plot
Papa pa pa pa Polla plot
polla plot man!